Superman, optimism, & DOOM…Posted: May 25, 2009
So let’s break this down into superheroes and its current trend in film. “Superman Returns,” the 2006 Bryan Singer dirge, didn’t fail because audiences no longer resonate with a super being that can fly, shoot heat from his eyes and is immune to bullets. It failed because Superman is the epitome of good morals and justice, which today’s audience find boring and childish.
It’s hard to give that kind of guy an edge unless he’s under some sort of spell. Perhaps if Clark picked up a crack whore and painted her with feces, then he’d be approaching “cool” again. “The Big Blue Boy Scout” as he is called by cynical fanboys and Guy Gardener, only works in a patriotic America. Changing him through some sort of rebranding effort or Warner reboot won’t make things different.
I mean, couldn’t Superman Returns have failed not because Americans are over morals and justice but because Superman Returns was a shitty movie?
Could it be that people didn’t want to watch a movie where Superman spends most of his time stalking Lois Lane? Perhaps they didn’t want to watch a movie where Superman knocked up Lois and then left for space for like 8 years? Or maybe they didn’t want to watch what was essentially a remake – with better special effects – of the original Superman movie? Perhaps a movie about a man who has awesome powers yet barely uses them through the 2 hour + film isn’t going to be a blockbuster smash? And seriously, is a movie where Kumar beats the shit out of Superman really going to make waves?
Yeah. It was movie goers and the American people who failed Superman Returns, not Bryan Singer who failed movie goers. Optimism and morals are dead in America!
Or maybe things aren’t so bleak. Perhaps optimistic, fun movies can succeed along with dark, brooding films like The Dark Knight. Well, if those movies don’t suck.
If only there was a recent film that could prove my point… hmm…
Oh wait, there is.
Clearly, we are DOOMED.