Why Civil War (#5) is a bad comic…

I find it absolutely hilarious well Millar cops to how stupid some of his idea are within the text of this own comic.

Example:

Sue to Johnny:
Pretending we’re a married couple is the creepiest thing I’ve ever done

Best of the bunch:

Photon, in reference to the Punisher joining Captain America’s side:
Am I the only one laughing my guts out at the irony here?

What’s so glaring about this whole Civil War mess is the inconsistency across the line (not to mention within the Civil War mini itself). For example, in the Amazing Spider-Man lead-in to this issue you’ve got Tony Stark acting like a huge asshole of Nazi-like proportions, with veiled threats to Spider-Man’s family. BUT when you crack open you’re brand new copy of Civil War #5, you’ve got to the two characters’ positions reversed. Peter is the dick, and Tony is the troubled hero; they don’t need to fight, they can work their differences out.

Hell, Millar completely throws consistent characterization out the window with this issue (well, maybe last issue too but for the sake of argument…); Captian America teams up with the Punisher, for christ’s sake! She-Hulk, who in her own book was wishy-washy about the whole Pro-registration thing, is now more gung-ho then Reed Richards, who as of the very last issue of Civil War and the FF tie-in was strongest Pro-registration guy there is. Oh sure, Sue’s left him but he seemed to suck that up back in the FF tie-in.

This issue, seemed to have three purposes:

1.) To show just how badass the Punisher is. He blew off two guys’ heads. Badass. He has the covert-ops knowledge to break into the Baxter Building. BADASS!

2.) To show, despite Millar trying his hardest in earlier issues, just how tortured Tony Stark is. He doesn’t want to do ANY of this. If he didn’t work for the gov’t and round up his friends, things would be WORSE. Like there’s anything worse then unleashing a killer clone and locking up people in the negative zone. Also: clearly all this is really Maria Hill’s fault.

3.) To show how completely worthless Spider-Man is. In this issue he gets his ass handed to him by two third string super-villains. If the scene on the cover had actually happened in this issue, I would get Peter getting whooped. Bullseye, Green Golbin, and Venom are three of the top villains in the Marvel Universe. But Prankster? Jack O’Latern? Come on Millar. Try harder.

This issue, like the one before it, was a total disaster. This series and cross-over are complete off the rails. BUT I do have to give Millar credit. At least he didn’t end the issue on a full-page spread that changed everything.

RATING: UTTER SHIT

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3 Comments on “Why Civil War (#5) is a bad comic…”

  1. psycholarry says:

    huh, now that my wife and brother in law are being attacked by an army, I am starting to have misgivings about this whole “hunt down heroes” think I helped start.

  2. true. BUT in the FF issue that dealt with this Reed seemed to “be okay” (sort of) with Sue leaving and joining the resistance.


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